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How to be more confident

Many things happen that can affect your self-confidence. The list is endless such as unemployment, a business deal that has gone wrong, relationships, unexpected circumstances, social media, etc. In this blog post, we share ideas on being more confident. If you incorporate some of these ideas, your self-confidence could improve.

1. Professional help

Seeking professional help can help you improve your self-esteem and overcome your limiting beliefs or mental blocks. Therapy is a safe space to overcome psychological issues and thus work on your inner self. A life coach is a great mentor to help you with your mindset, goals and hold you accountable. These professional outlets are an excellent investment for your mental health and overall wellbeing. Make sure you choose a therapist or life coach with which you're compatible. Be patient until you find the right person for you.

2. Affirmations and Music

What you listen subconsciously affects your behaviors. Affirmations and music are great ways to empower yourself. YouTube has a variety of affirmations. We suggest you listen to self-love and self-confidence affirmations. You can also personalize your affirmations. For example, when you think about a limiting belief, you can replace it with an affirmation. If your limiting belief is I am unworthy, you can replace that with I deserve everything I need and more. Furthermore, be selective with the music that you listen to. Listen to music that is emotionally mature and healthy. Listen to music that empowers you and makes you feel good.

3. Visualize

Visualize who you want to be. Think about the man or woman you've always wanted to be. The woman or man of your dreams. Ask yourself these questions

  • What time does she go to bed?

  • What does he eat?

  • What are her daily habits?

  • What does he do for a living?

  • Where does she live?

  • What does he wear?

  • How much money does she earn?

  • What are his values?

  • What are her hobbies?

Ask yourself questions and write down the answers. This will serve as a blueprint for you to follow to become who you've always wanted to be. This is a commitment between who you are now and your future self. Next, make a vision board that reminds you of who you want to be. When you know who you are and where you're headed, you're less likely to be distracted by things that don't align with you.

4. Look for evidence

There are so many talented, stylish, intelligent, and successful people in the world right now. Once you identify the life you want to lead, find evidence and examples of the people you admire. Let that be proof that it's possible to be who you were always meant to be. For instance, if Rihanna can have a beauty empire, so can you. Let that inspire you, empower you and remind you to never underestimate the vision you have for your life. Why? Because history shows that it's possible. Make a list of all the possibilities and let that influence your actions.

5. Stay true to yourself.

"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken." - Oscar Wilde.

What can being true to yourself look like? It can look like listening to and honoring your emotions even if it threatens your friendships or relationships. Being acquainted or liked by others shouldn't come at the cost of suppressing your feelings and diluting who you are. It can look like 100% owning everything about you, your values, likes, dislikes, choices in fashion or entertainment. In essence, it means standing in your own truth regardless of how others perceive you. Being true to yourself shows others that you love yourself. It shows everyone around you that you choose yourself.

6. Be proactive

A proactive mindset is a great life skill to have. Being proactive means, you don't wait for things to happen. It means engaging in behaviors and taking steps towards making things happen for yourself. You need to actively take responsibility for your life. Don't give up your fate to the weather, your parents, your partner, or even the government. Living is a huge responsibility, and living with intention is more challenging but more beneficial. Be self-sufficient and independent. When you depend on external factors, it puts you at risk of being vulnerable and reactive towards life. Take steps every day to be better than yesterday by consistently moving in a positive direction.

7. Internal validation vs external validation

Chasing external validation will leave you burnt-out, running on empty, with a compromised sense of identity, and it has the potential to be a never-ending harmful cycle. Instead, learn to validate yourself internally. Start by accepting your feelings without any judgment. Put your value in intangible things about yourself. Don't place your value in what you can't control, people's actions, or beauty trends because none of those things reflect who you indeed are on the inside. Internal validation is accepting yourself thoroughly, and you will attract things that are aligned with the core of your being. Praise yourself. Tell yourself the things that you want others to hear from others. Do for yourself what you want others to do for you. Don't wait for others to validate you. Validate yourself all day, every day, 365 days of the year. Ask yourself what you need and cater to those needs. Prioritize your needs and emotions.

8. Toxic anything

Remove, eliminate or distance yourself from anything toxic in your life right now. Toxicity is very harmful to your mental health and overall wellbeing. Everything you do is an exchange of energy, so if you're constantly exposed to negative energy in any form, you will feel drained. You won't have the peace nor have the power to spend time doing things that matter to you. If you want to build your self-confidence, you will need to channel your energy into things or people that are healthy and wholesome.

9. Comparisons

Don't compare yourself to others. Even if you have an identical twin, don't compare yourself to them. The pace and level of your journey will not be the same as others. Comparison will make you underappreciate your strengths, talents, skills, and the obstacles you overcame. Be inspired by others but don't compare yourself. Stay grounded and centered in who you are today and who you want to be tomorrow.

10. Take care of yourself.

If you want to be more confident, you have to take care of yourself. Take care of your mind, body, and soul. Eat healthy, exercise, have enough sleep. Nurture your mind, unplug from the world and be present with yourself. Do activities that will keep you centered and help calm your emotions. Journaling and being in nature are suitable for your mind and body. Eat more plant-based food.

11. Bad habits

Your past can have a positive or negative impact on your self-confidence. Be honest with yourself and do a postmortem analysis of your life. Identify your bad habits, patterns, or choices that didn't positively contribute to your life. Please don't judge yourself while you're doing this exercise. Instead, show yourself more compassion. Then make a list of good habits you want to implement in your life. Make sure that the new lifestyle is pretty simple and achievable. Maybe even start changing one thing at a time. Over time your self-confidence will improve. Remember, "Rome wasn't built in a day." it will take a lot of time and effort to change habits that were built over time.

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